Why am I always here procrastinating  hesitating instead of putting in my very best and regret every second, every mins afterwards?

Why am I always so indecisive.. so.. irony.. so contradicting?
Why am I always the one that choose to stay and ended up hurting my own self instead?

Mayb I didn't change at all. I am still the old me afterall..

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Why am I always hoping for things that doesn't come true at all?
Why am I always been there looking at stuff that are related to you?
Why am I always doing that something, jus to see/ contact you again but regret afterward?

Before I even meet u, I told myself that I will try to understand u, know u more even before we get together..
i'm glad that we have got together in the end. And got into a rs which lasted for 3 years. However, if given a chance, i wished that we are not tgt in the first place.. if we are not in a rs.. both u and me wouldn't have got hurt that badly. afterall.. its my fault.. i lied..

sigh..